Najpametniji klijenti na svijetu

Nisam vidio da je netko već ovo stavio, ali isplati se pogledati na kakve se sve izvanserijske klijente može naići. :rolleyes:

-> Clients from hell

jao :slight_smile:

dosao sam do sedme stranice…

ovaj je najjaci!

Me: “Ok, we’ve pushed the site live.”

Client: “Why isn’t the site #1 on Google yet?”

Me: “We just pushed it live five minutes ago.”

Client: “Optimize the fireball.”

Me: “I’m sorry? Do you mean the firewall?”

Client: “I need more hits NOW, so I need you to optimize the fireball. I know what I’m talking about!”

Me: “We’ll get right on it


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Mene ovaj podsjeća na sličnu temu koja je aktualna ovdje na forumu:

Client: “I have a great idea, and I’d like to bring you on board as a partner.”

Me: “Go on…”

Client: “It’s great. I want to recreate Google, but make it better.”

Me: “How?”

Client: “Well that’s where your expertise comes in.”

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ovaj je dobar :smiley:

Client: “This is absolutely wrong. Where’s all the HTML. We want the HTML?”

Me: “I don’t understand. All the files should be on the flash drive we gave you yesterday.”

Client: “Well… whats all this php jumbo-mumbo?”

Me: “PHP is just a language. It does all the work for your CMS. You can’t have CMS with only HTML files.

Client: “I get it. You just don’t understand. WEB-SITES-ARE-MADE-OF-H-T-M-L… or did you not learn that in whatever school you went to?”

Me: “I didn’t go to college.”

Client: “I’m working with a bunch of idiots.”

Vidio sam taj site i prije, ali dobro da si me sjetio adrese :slight_smile:

Client:“I changed the file name to ‘logo-blue.png’ and it didn’t change to blue. It turned into a small box with a red X in it. Have you broken it?”

Me: “…”

lol ovaj je isto žestok :smiley:

Client: I hate the logo. I really really hate the logo. I can’t bear to look at it. It makes me sick just to see it. I want you to design another one!

Us: Erm… why? You approved it a few months ago.

Client: Yes, but you knew I didn’t like it then. You need to change it.

Us: You approved it. You had your business cards printed.

Client: Yes. I hate them too!

Us: If you want a new logo, we’ll be happy to help, but we would have to charge you for it.

Client: (almost screaming) What? Why the fuck should I pay you for something that I hate! You pressurised me into approving it. I can change my mind if I want to. It’s my prerogative as a customer to change my mind. And I hate the website too.

Us: You had the opportunity to change your mind during the design process, but didn’t. You approved everything. And what’s wrong with the website?

Client: I fucking hate it!

Us: But it’s exactly what you asked for.

Client: I know it is, but I’ve changed my mind. I can do that. And I’m not paying you until I’m happy with it!

Us: You’ve already paid us for it.

Client: I’m going to take you to court, and trading standards.

Us: We’ll miss you as a client.

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